The Day That Went Missing

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The Day That Went Missing: A Family's Story is a memoir by Richard Beard about a tragedy from his childhood and how his family kept quiet about it for years.

In 1978, when Richard was eleven and his younger brother Nicky was nine, they were swimming in the sea off Cornwall. A strong undertow pulled them under. Richard managed to reach the shore and call for help, but it was too late. Nicky drowned.

Almost forty years later, Richard tries to understand why his family acted as if nothing had happened. He treats the death like an inquest, talking to his mother and his brothers Tim and Jem, and even a lifeboat crew member who helped with the rescue. He also visits Nicky’s grave and the beach where he died.

One shocking discovery is that after Nicky’s funeral, the family returned to the same Cornwall vacation house and continued their holiday without talking about what happened. This silence continued into their school years, shaping how they dealt with grief.

Richard also confronts his father, who died in 2011 after years of illness. The father had sent the boys to boarding school when they were eight, which kept the family apart and helped repress their feelings. Richard believes his father’s silence about Nicky played a big part in the family’s emotional distance, and he wishes his father had tried harder to save his son that day.

The book was well received. It won the 2018 PEN/Ackerley Prize for literary biography and was shortlisted for several other prizes, including the Rathbones Folio Prize, the James Tait Black Memorial Prize, and the National Book Critics Circle Award in the United States.

Critics praised its honesty and emotional depth, with many calling it a powerful and moving memoir about memory, denial, and grief.

Around the UK release in 2017, Beard wrote two Guardian articles. He described rediscovering his relationship with Nicky and how writing the book changed his family. He talked about their past rivalry and said that writing helped bring them closer, with his mother now expressing relief that they are talking more openly.